So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I am not eating basil off your cock
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
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