I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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