My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
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