Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
i barfeds in our rink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
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