Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize