I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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