i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
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