Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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