We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
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