just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
Randomize