your room smells of hookers.
And success
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize