yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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