Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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