Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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