Hey man sorry I got all grabby
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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