a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
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