my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
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