i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
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