he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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