whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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