So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize