you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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