Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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