Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize