U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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