Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Randomize