Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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