I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize