i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
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