On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I enjoy the company of your penis
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Randomize