I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
wakey wakey hands off snakey
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
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Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
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We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
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