____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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