I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
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