do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize