You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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