the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
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