Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
My lighter is stuck in my beard.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize