PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
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