Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Oh god it's open bar.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
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