i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
Randomize