thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize