Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize