Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
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