I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
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