There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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