How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think weed is turning my hair brown
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize