who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize