Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
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