is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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