Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
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